Preferential treatment

... it is not lost on Mum that not only the age or self inflicted related treatment, the silent preference treatment for who you know in the world of health and social care ... 

it is trickling out into the fallout of the infra structure where patients get the benefits of private health care ... 

The majority of the professional sector diversify from the original training into much other  ... and themselves benefit from the private sector while the ill in mental capacity lost souls are in the gutter or archaic circumstances.... 

Knowledge is power though in this the scale of class and disdain for the ill is silently archaic still despite coming a long way since work houses, asylums and slaves, and the long term colour of the skin issues of segregation of the tones of skin colour, in blond to religion to culture. The slaying in sectors of scales of humans in genocide in many forms or used to serve or service needs beyond the wife a hypocrisy to the disgusting of those cultures who have more than one wife ... under the guise of ownership of a servant/slave ... in status ... 

And in this mind of suffering from extremes and before that ... if we evolved from the ape ... how did we appear in the colours of the spectrum in hues of white, reddy pink or yellow or brown cream cream, 

An early Valentine

gift to self ... though I never not need an excuse ... The perseverance in much since my life altered drastically... 

And today another trip out for yet another blood test request. The vials of blood lined up today ... no one yet to say the usual jest to this over the months since the death of hubby, that I have already lost  too much again, to see even more flow into this line up of colour coded tubes! 

... a simplistic ill ...

Peirrot time ...

... and the phobias some have of these images of clowns .... using the fun times of an app, like some of media that I still do not get the point with sometimes ... At least we can exchange images of dressing up, without actually bothering to dress up these days ... and the funniest of the lot seeing each other pout and pose to a screen ... 

The honesty of some who use social media to find out what the family are up to, rather than to post themselves, for that is the only way to find out. The dynamics of families. And the amount of hassle some too have from those on the verge of stalking.  

The swift posting of news and getting to see it before the traditional method of a telephone call etc. Those in the know, not letting key people know, just before it is made public. This bemuses my Mum... getting the news via her other daughter's device, before the telephone rings these days ...

The decisive

moves to a more restful time in movement from room to room. The adjusting to current requirements in the physical ailments of life for the times they come ... The waves of abundance in mishaps mayhem and mystical mysteries ... 

Again this mind a spectrum of colour and shade 

The thoughts and appreciation among my distant in distance from life surrounds 

A walk along memory ways

the years intermix with a house destroyed... 

The repeats of time lost in paperwork, a burden to me now ....

The many jolts in pain and joys. The years misted into grief. The reawakening within my being given such pleasure where there is much pain too ... 

A Walk Along The Lanes ...

back in November on my first day in my childhood town ...to lay some Cornish Anemones where Dad is now to rest ... 

The start of some days in Kernow of hill walks, fresh medicinal air followed by evenings in by a roaring fire, catching up on the movies missed since we lost interest in our life at time of adversity, now with my sister.

Today a step towards a permanent time here; to enjoy the estuary, coast, and the region in general ... 

Cornish Food ...

this continues on from the end of last November. I did this as a memory test; with my confusion days that still come at me while adjusting to the world outside of those four walls ... that was ... in the bleak last days of my deceased hubby's life.

Cornish food as with any local and regional products are delicious and scrumptious, as is the West Country's scrumpy which was one of my husband's favorites. We used to stop off on our car journey back from Kernow, in one of the counties I am struggling to remember today, to purchase some regional food to take back home with us.

I am planning to make a Cornish Cream Tea and some Cornish Pasties in the coming weeks. I will also have in mind while clearing the home, some of the delicious local produce in this county, on my move there. Saffron cake is good too, all these products though in moderation.I particularly like the local bakery donuts; the best I have tasted in the places I travelled so far. The coastal and estuary and woodland and hill walks will counter balance the intake of this occasional indulgence. And the trike rides. I intend to get a trike. I hope I am not dizzy or lightheaded by then, it will be safer for me. I do not care for what it looks like. I want to feel safe. One tries to adapt with ones ills.